{"id":764,"date":"2019-02-03T08:00:18","date_gmt":"2019-02-03T13:00:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.hanoverbaptistchurch.org\/blogpastor\/?p=764"},"modified":"2019-02-02T21:39:07","modified_gmt":"2019-02-03T02:39:07","slug":"what-does-the-bible-say-about-the-victim-mentality","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hanoverbaptistchurch.org\/blogpastor\/2019\/what-does-the-bible-say-about-the-victim-mentality\/","title":{"rendered":"What does the Bible say about the victim mentality?"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

\u201cNow a certain man was there who had an infirmity thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there, and knew that he already had been in that condition a long time, He said to him, \u2018Do you want to be made well?\u2019 The sick man answered Him, \u2018Sir, I have no man to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up\u2026.\u2019\u201d John\u00a05:5ff<\/cite><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

There must be something attractive about developing a victim mentality, or else there would be less of it in our world today. It is such a pervasive malady in our society that we would do well to investigate whether we too have ingested the poison even to the point of souring our relationship with both God and man.<\/p>\n

First, let\u2019s define what we are talking about. There seem to be three distinctions which grow increasingly powerful over a person. A victim is anyone who has experienced a loss, injury, or misfortune as a result of an event. A victim mentality moves the loss within the victim; it is the desire for empathy and allowances in light of a person\u2019s perceived innocence in causing the loss, injury or misfortune. Then, a victim complex is a pattern that defines a person\u2019s complete outlook on life.<\/p>\n

Next, what makes nurturing a victim mentality so attractive? All men are victims in one way or another, but that fact does not give any of us permission to nurse a victim mentality, nor install a victim complex. As a wise person once said, \u201cEven victims have responsibility.\u201d One of the conveniences of cherishing a victim mentality is that it feels like it gives you a pass from any responsibility. The victim feels he is not responsible for anything. If anything he thinks he is the object of unjust, immoral, and undeserved aggression. The victim likes the attention and empathy it brings, and gains satisfaction from telling his story. He reserves the right to complain and expects a pass from criticism. The victim mentality continues to \u201cvictimize\u201d the victim because he sees himself as powerless to change his situation and he sees the world as \u201cout to get him.\u201d It is a small step to attributing all his misfortunes to someone else\u2019s misdeeds. Esau and Absalom illustrate some traits of the victim mentality.<\/p>\n

Even criminals evidence victim thinking. They often believe themselves to be moral, even when engaging in a crime, thinking they are reacting to an immoral world run by authorities that single them out for persecution. Children also have a propensity to see themselves as victims of parental rules, and seek to make their parents feel guilty for enforcing the rules. Rules do not make rebels, they merely reveal them. A lesson for one and all is that others do not \u201cmake\u201d you do anything. Responsibility rests squarely in the individual human heart. It is not so much that we need counselors as much as we need repentance.<\/p>\n

Victimhood often indulges in playing \u201cthe blame game.\u201d The earliest illustration of this is in Genesis\u00a03:11\u201313: \u201cAnd [God] said, \u2018Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tee of which I commanded you that you should not eat?\u2019 Then [Adam] said, \u2018The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I ate.\u2019 And the LORD God said to the woman, \u2018What is this you have done?\u2019 The woman said, \u2018The serpent deceived me, and I ate.\u2019\u201d It is in our fallen nature to blame our sin and our misfortunes on our fathers, mothers, teachers, friends, and anyone within our view.<\/p>\n

One of the beautiful hallmarks of western law finds its roots in the Scriptural principle that a father cannot be punished for the crimes of the sons and the sons cannot be punished for the crimes of the fathers. But we like to find solace in shoveling the blame upon others. Jeremiah\u00a031:29f reads, \u201cIn those days they shall say no more: \u2018The fathers have eaten sour grapes, and the children\u2019s teeth are set on edge.\u2019 But every one shall die for his own iniquity; every man who eats the sour grapes, his teeth shall be set on edge.\u201d<\/p>\n

There was a saying in that day that essentially meant \u201cYou can\u2019t blame me, it is because of my father\u2019s failure.\u201d God\u2019s plain truth is that a man is responsible for his own sin. Romans\u00a014:12 reinforces this truth: \u201cSo then each of us shall give account of himself to God.\u201d<\/p>\n

Our Lord faces down what appears to be a case of victim mentality in John\u00a05 in dealing with the paralytic man. Our Lord\u2019s question seems odd, at first. \u201cDo you want to be made well?\u201d How odd to ask a man who has been sick for thirty-eight years, who is waiting by the pool where healing miracles are reputed to take place. I suspect there was a little bit of victim mentality deep within the sick man because his answer was not \u201cYes!\u201d It was \u201cI have no one to help\u201d and \u201cI get there too late.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jesus challenges him, \u201cRise, take up your bed and walk.\u201d He healed the man when he took up his responsibility to obey and trust the Savior.<\/p>\n

Of all who have walked this earth, our Savior had every excuse to play the \u201cvictim card\u201d (Hebrews\u00a04:15f). He was ridiculed by his brothers (John\u00a07:3ff), mocked (Matthew\u00a09:2ff), forsaken (Matthew\u00a026:31), falsely accused (Luke\u00a023:6ff), and crucified (Mark\u00a015:27ff).<\/p>\n

God\u2019s solution to victim mentality is to face your past and deal with it (Hebrews\u00a012:12\u201315), take responsibility for your own actions (Luke\u00a015:17ff), forgive as you are forgiven (Matthew\u00a05:12), trust God and His promises (Romans\u00a08:28ff), and serve others (Philippians\u00a02:5ff). Trust and obey.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cNow a certain man was there who had an infirmity thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there, and knew that he already had been in that condition a long time, He said to him, \u2018Do you want to be made well?\u2019 The sick man answered Him, \u2018Sir, I have no man to put me […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hanoverbaptistchurch.org\/blogpastor\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/764"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hanoverbaptistchurch.org\/blogpastor\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hanoverbaptistchurch.org\/blogpastor\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hanoverbaptistchurch.org\/blogpastor\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hanoverbaptistchurch.org\/blogpastor\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=764"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.hanoverbaptistchurch.org\/blogpastor\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/764\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hanoverbaptistchurch.org\/blogpastor\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=764"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hanoverbaptistchurch.org\/blogpastor\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=764"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hanoverbaptistchurch.org\/blogpastor\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=764"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}